14 February, 2011


Step #1-You will need a baby, preferably. Else anyone with a less than requisite IQ for their age range will also suffice.

Step#2- Put baby on his/her back and facing you. If baby refuses to face you, move right into baby's face and make like a solar eclipse till all the baby can see is you.

Step#3- Let go of all inhibitions, sense of importance and any positions attained at the office.

Step#4- Prepare to open and close mouth like goldfish, make spluttering sounds, even farty ones and basically sound like a clown on uppers and downers all at once! If that allusion doesn't ring a bell, think of Darwin and emulate a simian. If holding a banana will help draw forth your inner monkey, go for it!

Step#5- Don't spare the baby, if need be tickle till they puke the formula!

Step#6- Take a hit from the oxygen cylinder kept handy (did I skip this step?) since all the shenanigans will invariably leave you forgetting to breathe. If a woman, fall back on Lamaze learnt during birthing classes.

Step#7- If all else fails and desired decibels of laughter aren't elicited from baby, move away and let the baby watch the ceiling fan rotate. Guaranteed to bring forth gummy smiles and the kind that make the tots go boinkers!

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